Wednesday, June 11, 2008

My Google Doppelgänger


So I was waiting for a return phone call this afternoon, and as I sat for fifteen boring minutes at my laptop, loathe to read one more word about politics (for a change) and desperately trying to avoid looking at all those tempting vintage dresses on eBay, I did something kind of silly (surely I am the last person on Earth to do this): I Googled my name--without the married appellation--to see if I had an interesting Google twin out there somewhere.

As it turns out, I do. And damn it if she isn't considerably younger, cuter, and smarter than I--a Fullbright scholar, in fact, fluent in German and blessed with a bright smile and an even brighter future. While we have the name, as well as the English-teacher thing, in common, the similarities end there: Deborah 2.0 has apparently won just about every scholarship and award there is, and she was recently accepted into law school. *Sigh*

Well, I thought, biting my lip and trying not to feel like a complete waste of space. I can drive really fast; I can translate English into Spanish, and then into (weak) Italian, and thereafter into (strong) profanity--often simultaneously and while taking a shower. I was rejected by four of the six law schools to which I applied (and the two softies who liked me were located, respectively, in Atlanta and Malibu Beach, and attending either would've meant no boyfriend, no marriage, and no My Three Sons, which is kind of unthinkable). Also: I can make a wicked "honorary Italian's" marinara, and I can balance en pointe, unassisted, for several minutes while I ransack the uppermost shelf for the crushed red pepper so crucial to the sauce. And you should see me sort four boys' worth of sweat-socks by size into nice, tidy piles--it's a treat to watch, seriously.

A question, then: who's your Google Doppelgänger, and what do you have/not have in common with him or her?

Also at Cogitamus.

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